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She sat on the rungs to the house face in her palms as I drove in from work. Usually she is in the house or with our neighbor in the back yard, something I have disapproved over the time we’ve been together but seeing the look on her face I wished she were with our neighbor. I switched off the engine but switched it on again to raise the passenger seat window. It was down because I was with my workmate Carol and dropped her at her house. It was approaching winter and roads were too slippery for her starlet. She rolled down the window since she hated my car’s perfume out of personal reasons. I liked Carol as she was funny, easy to talk to and had my grandmother’s golden eyes that I never stopped looking into. When the windows were up, I brought the engine to a stop then peered through the now dark evening sky to the place she sat. Normally, she would be at my side, hoping that I open the door to let her in. But this was not a normal day, first the car smelt faintly of Carol’s Chanel cologne and perhaps my mate here would discover few strands of hair on the seat.

I grabbed my briefcase from the back seat and headed out. She looked up, just one quick glance at me, then back to her reverie. I hesitated at first but decided to man up.

“Hey,” I whispered.

She looked up then returned her face to her palms which were moist from either silent weeping or sweat. That is a typical, “leave me alone dude.” I was torn between comforting her and running into the house to scamper for safety. I settled for the later, I pushed the door open, threw my briefcase on the dining room table since there was stuff to work on later and raced to my room. Surprisingly the door was ajar, we had agreed with her not to leave the door open but neither of us was in the mood for a fight. (Let’s give her a name; she has been fellowship for long now. I will call her Winy.) I guessed something was amiss; maybe her mother came and insisted on spending the night in the bedroom or perhaps her brothers. I pulled out an imaginary gun from my waist, cocked it and raised it an inch above my shoulder, I jumped into the room.

“FBI freeze!” I shouted, imitating Amanda.

I froze instead. Not because the bedroom window was open and my secret safe broken into, or that her mother and brother were dancing to my favourite Katy Perry album on my bed-that would hurt- but because right there, on my six by six poster bed, in black and white was my diary, my journal, my confidant whom I confided all my nasty secrets and plans to, open and the late breeze flipping through the pages. How come I was so careless? How long did she read it before giving in? Did she read about my encounter with Joluene, about my secret crush on Carol and how I planned to take her sky diving during summer? Winy had every reason to be mad I agreed. I was even lucky she had not yet left though the confrontation would be explosive. I needed a shower real quick to help me unwind and create a lie. I had barely stepped out when I saw her on the floor mat, expression on her face indifferent but surely in a mood to argue and throw tantrums. I was on the receiving end. Winy does not talk much but when she does she articulates her points well enough to incriminate you. At first it was a plus for me and the very reason I fell for her from day one. Our meeting was fateful and how I allowed her into my house is a story for another day. I trusted her with everything to the point I became careless and as soon as I was out of this towel, we shall fight that I knew for sure. I flashed back to the year we shared the house. She was easy to be with and to please, she was also fun and occupying though sometimes she needed to be left alone (we rhymed at that). Life had become so easy and bearable. Her presence ensured that we cooked our food thus reduced the trips to the fast food joint for pizza and she became my mate for early morning jogs and my waist and tummy reduced by an inch.

Winy was not angry that I spent a week at Joluene’s or by the things we did, nor was she mad at me for seeing Carol or for the up-coming sky diving escapade. She was mad because I left her out in the ‘we’ stuff. She learnt that I was going camping alone deep into the woods which truthfully I was contemplating on whether to tag her along. The problem is, having her in the woods is electrifying but she is a nemophilist and we get into trouble or cold and wet, which I do not mind but this time I needed some me time. Winy argued that even if she came, she would be silent when I needed silence, that she was okay with me even when I did my stuff in solitude. She was right but I caught a cunning smile at the edge of her lips. We were improving and bloodshed was out of the topic. Winy whined why I had not brought Carol home or rather had the two meet on a date.

“That would be weird!” I shouted weirdly.

She hated that I would sky dive behind her back and was worried if I sustained injuries. I assured that both would happen. That is meeting Carol and allowing her company during the trip to the woods. I thought all was settled when she dropped the bombshell.

“You shithole said in your journal dated the 13th of August that I am one dirty thing, that I do not know how to groom well and you had worries of me infecting you. That is the reason you never allowed me to your room,” I looked away, blushing scarlet and pinching myself to wake up.

“When you agreed to make me partner for life, it was in good and bad. Your bad, in affairs and wishing to bring her in for me to share you with, I have tolerated but my bad, in grooming which I have really been working on you write about it. Do you have an idea about how that feels? ” She asked, her golden eyes brimming with tears.

I looked at my feet, the toe nails were long and the reason for my torn socks. Winy had a point which I could not argue with, ladies win all the time.

“For the sentiments, I am sorry, for the rest how about I make it up to you with me preparing us supper,” I begged. She smiled. As I earlier said, it is so easy to be with Winy. We held each other in a two minute long bear hug then she pushed me away to go and prepare supper as she sprawled herself on my bed.

I am in love.